GUEST POST from Don – A Government

A Derisive Comment about a GOVERNMENT

[It is difficult to communicate sarcasm in written text, so let me clearly state at the very beginning that the following post IS sarcasm.]

Some things government does are smart because they are essential for the good of the people.  Speaking contumely, giving grants to study the sex life of toads, seemingly a favorite pastime of a government, is not too smart.

Having learned from COVID that they could push the population around just for the fun of it (some people actually enjoyed being pushed, I believe), recently a government has stepped up to interfere with how we cook our meals and clean our clothes.  Efficiency is already built into these items, so I don’t see the point.  Modern gas stoves are not statistically more dangerous to our health (ones manufactured 40 years ago WERE because they had pilot lights), nor do they add significantly more fuel to climate change than electric models because they are incredibly efficient.  Plus, they are safer.  The National Fire Protection Association reported in 2020 “Households that use electric ranges have a higher risk of cooking fires and associated losses than those using gas ranges.”  Only 38% of households even have a gas range and that number has naturally declined over the last decade.  Washing machines have been becoming more efficient without major government interference, too.  

As a result of the vacuity of a government on these two issues I’m thinking of buying a wood-fired cook stove for my kitchen to replace that “awful” gas contraption.  Plus, those ringer washers of the 1950s were very efficient.  One could wash multiple loads in the same water if the whites were laundered first.  They saved water and soap.  A clothesline running from the home to the shed was very inexpensive as well.  Backward is the new way forward!!!

So, I began to look around for something else, something we commonly use, which this kind of a government could bulldoze its citizens to eliminate in order to reduce our contribution to climate change…and I found it.  It is HUGE!!!

Changing this one item used in our daily lives would reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, reduce family expenses, keep us safer while driving and walking, help us to re-engage with the world, advance  valuable ways to protect personal privacy, make our lives simpler, and reduce other frustrations.  Like I said, it is HUGE.

If an insane government made THIS decision, it would have an impact on climate change that would far outpace that caused by removing both natural gas ranges from our kitchens and changing how we launder our clothes.

In fact, the family savings allowed from changing this one item in many cases would be equal to the annual cost of student loan payments.  That fulfills two goals of a government.  And just like replacing gas stoves and convenient washers, it would be very irritating to present-day Americans (thus, a third goal fulfilled).  It is a beautiful addition to the stupidity and therefore MUST be adopted by leaders, not for themselves (of course) but for the great unwashed.

What is it?

I thought you would never ask.  

Backward is the new way forward, so we must go back to land line phones and give up all cell phones.  If a government got wind of this idea it would change life as we know it.  It would anger our citizens.  It is definitely regressive enough to fit the pattern.  It might even solve climate change single-handedly.  It would free up more family finances for the additional tax burden and inflation.  It is, therefore, the PERFECT choice for a government.

The book “1984” got a few things wrong.  First, we are not at war with other countries; we have developed a government-led “climate agenda” instead.  Second, it is occurring 40 years later than predicted.  But two things an over-reaching government will NEVER do…1) reduce the use of surveillance, and 2) end the practice of pushing around its citizens for no discernible reason.  If you are a thoughtful, honest citizen a government must punish you.  Sweet deals are only for criminals and illegals.

Thanks for reading.  I well imagine my next article may need to be smuggled out.

Copyright 2023 Donald Whelpley

[PLEASE NOTE that Don is always open to discussing the thoughts and opinions he shares here and welcomes comments as shared in the comment section. He doesn’t use other social media platforms, as I do, and won’t see whatever you’d like to share with him elsewhere. ~ Sherry]


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