Tuesday Titters – Nov. 16, 2021 Edition

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.

The waitress asks for their orders. The guy says, β€œA hamburger, fries, and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, β€œWhat’s yours?”

β€œI’ll have the same,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. β€œThat will be $18.40 please.”

The man reaches into his pocket and, without looking, pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the guy and the ostrich return to the same restaurant and the guy says, β€œA hamburger, fries, and a coke.”

The ostrich says, β€œI’ll have the same.”

Again the guy reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until one night they enter the restaurant and the waitress asks, β€œThe usual?”

β€œNo, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad”, says the guy.

β€œMe too,” says the ostrich.

The waitress brings the order and says, β€œThat will be $42.62.”

Once again the guy pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer. β€œExcuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”

β€œWell,” says the guy, β€œseveral years ago I was cleaning my attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”

β€œThat’s brilliant!” says the waitress. β€œMost people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

β€œThat’s right. Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the guy.

The waitress asks, β€œBut, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”

The guy sighs and answers, β€œMy second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say.”

Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *