IMPROVING ON…
There are things “wise guys” say … which I believe don’t match reality. I’m sure I can improve on their kind of “wisdom.” The following ARE actual quotes from modern “medicine men.”
1. “Don’t Complain. Do something about it.”
Except most of the things about which we complain are things OUTSIDE our control. Weather, government websites, stupid human tricks, etc. I once worked for a boss who never wanted to hear suggestions (an attempt to “do something about it”) and instead viewed suggestions as “complaints.” Now what, wise guy?
It turns out that we need more than a “do something” mindset. We need greater discernment. For example, is this something I can do something about? Will my “something” solve the issue or am I merely making myself feel “significant” when what I’m doing is NOT significant? (See Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for more info.)
2. “Don’t start a relationship when you are not in love.
OK, wise guy, no duh! Motivations are a heavy subject, though, and I don’t think a “saying” is going to help the person who has the emotional need for “companionship.” How does this “wisdom” help anyone? Reality: there are many reasons to start a relationship which may not have love as the top purpose and which can still work out well. Love is not the highest priority in every case. (In frontier days it was not unusual for a widow to marry a widower even though there was no love. He needed someone to raise his children and she needed financial support.) Isn’t it better to suggest that we should “understand” our reasons for starting the relationship and make sure the one we are with understands our reasons, too? For example, I know a woman who wanted to marry in order to have a baby the proper way. Medical conditions required she hurry. The man she married knew her reasons. I don’t think he shared his true reasons for marrying her, though. A few years later I saw her and she was happy to have gotten what she wanted even though they divorced.
3. “Don’t care about what people think of you.”
OK, wise guy, what others think may be significant. Sometimes what others think matters not at all; and sometimes that matters a whole bunch. Again what is needed is discernment, not outright dismissal. Is this a legitimate gripe or concern? (You don’t want your legitimate concerns dismissed without consideration, so why ignore others who may have legitimate concerns?) First identify what parts are legitimate, and toss the rest. This way you show that you care about people. Then learn from the legitimate concern
4. “Take more risks. Don’t be a wimp.”
Eh!? Are you trying to figure out what this wise guy is saying? Me, to
Risk is putting something of value on the line (money, time, reputation, or relationship). Don’t risk something you can’t afford to lose. However, taking a chance on a sensible risk could bring great rewards. So, don’t risk your rent on the lottery. That’s just plain STUPID (don’t say that aloud). Every choice involves risk. You aren’t wimp, but maybe you need a bit of a push to take a sensible risk. What is a sensible risk? Marriage, Education (other than Underwater Basket Weaving), or Applying for a Better Job.
5. “There’s no end game. We as a species just are. Don’t try to figure it all out. Enjoy your journey.”
Nah! I’m of the opinion that if there is no end game, there is also no journey. There is no point in saving the earth. Relationships are meaningless. Science is a waste of time. In other words, no goal = no purpose. Why play the game if you can’t win? Why imagine there’s something to enjoy if this is all you get? Anyone can be natural, but even perfection in this world has limits; it takes something extra to be supernatural.
Even if I am wrong I would rather have a purpose to (and beyond) this life than give in to the corrupting thought that nothing else exists. These wise guys can’t prove me wrong anyway. On the other hand, once you have seen your first “impossible” thing happen you KNOW there is a good probability that MORE exists than we can see or measure. I’ve seen miracles, so…
Even if I had never seen a miracle (something naturally impossible), I have read of those who claimed to have done everything to run a good race to win the prize (Saint Paul, for one). They spent their entire adult lives with a single purpose. That purpose did not include being wealthy or having stardom. That purpose what not told in number of years lived or positions they held. Their purpose what to serve someone else with all their will, energy, and intent. I’ve seen married couples do this. I’ve read of those who spent their lives helping others they didn’t even know (Mother Theresa comes to mind).
6. “Money is not the most important thing.” (Finally something worthwhile!) They continue: “You have to train yourself to focus on providing value instead.” (OK, those wise guys blew a good thing.)
Their problem is that if there’s no “end game” then there is nothing which provides true value. I can’t trust someone like that to say anything useful for my life. What’s worthwhile if there’s nothing for which to live?
Clearly, we MUST have an “end game” in order to understand what is of value. Love, joy, contentment, satisfaction … they all imply value and purpose WHEN they point to a goal; there’s a point to enjoying them. They all become selfish and useless WHEN there is no goal. You don’t love if there’s no value in it after YOU are gone. Love becomes merely a means to fulfilling selfish desires. Certainly it is cruel to have children in a world when there’s nothing worth living for. You have children when you can impart hope. I agree with the wise guys that money is not a valuable source of hope; merely a path to more toys before you die.
These modern wise guys have forgotten the truths from earlier wise men. For example, the Westminster Shorter Catechism from 1648 states wisdom very clearly. “Q. 1. What is the chief end of man? A. Man’s chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy him for ever.” Truth doesn’t change like technology does.
But wait! There’s more. Romans 3:23 tells us that “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” What does that mean? It actually means that God’s purpose for man was glory. Sin thwarted that purpose. God’s desire is not to PUNISH us for those sins, but to RESTORE us so we will not miss out. He wants us to enjoy what He created us to enjoy. Cool.
Copyright 2025 Donald Whelpley
[PLEASE NOTE that Don is always open to discussing the thoughts and opinions he shares here and welcomes comments as shared in the comment section. He doesn’t use other social media platforms and won’t see whatever you’d like to share with him if you post it elsewhere.
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