COUPLES THERAPY!
I read a real article on couples therapy along with several actual “comments” (below). Some (all) comments on couples therapy are bad advice (from people who failed at being a couple). What would the story be if these commenters’ former lovers were to respond to their posts? (The following responses to the comments are meant as a joke! I also know that every social media site sounds just like the responses that following the comments).
Juan Carlos says: “Women need therapy. Men do not.”
Response: Listen for the buzzer signaling wrong answer.
Craig says: “Thank God, I’ve been single for 23 years. I’m much happier than I was when I was with a woman. All they do is to push you around, Tell you what to do and ruin your life.”
Response: Believe me, Craig, all the women who know you are also glad you’ve been single for 23 years. You only think about yourself. You’re buying all the happiness you can afford.
Karl says: “Men. Do not ever get married. Just use ’em and leave ’em. Just like they do to us. Don’t lose half your stuff.”
Response: Fool! Any woman can sue you for half your stuff, but you won’t find those stories in the magazines you “read.” If you move in for ONE DAY she can sue. I’m sure what you have in your trailer no woman wants, though.
Alan the Tenor says: “I see couple’s therapy just like Big Pharma, they don’t want to cure your problem. They want to manage it for the continued income.”
Response: Please explain in your lowest tone possible, Alan, how it is that Big Pharma has created drugs that CURE cancer. Also explain to those couples who found healing through counseling how you could be so ignorant. Do you comment on anything else you don’t know anything about? Oh, how we all wish Big Pharma could cure your ignorance.
G_off says: “Couples therapy ends in divorce more often than reconciliation.”
Response: The couples who go to therapy ARE heading for divorce. Even if what you say is true (I doubt you know whether it is factual), you are admitting that therapy redeems SOME who were heading toward a sure dead end. Some is always better than none. Or, do you have a problem with some winning (even though you haven’t)?
Shirt Collar says: “it was hard me to find a woman that i was comfortable with.
i found therapy very helpful in dealing with trauma that was holdng (sic) me back from meaningful connections. then i worked with a life coach on my career goals. i now have a new role in an exciting company, with a significant increase in salary. the extra income has given me the opportunity to invest in a start up my friends from college are working on and to show appreciation for my parents who went without in order for me to have an education. i set aside time to work on my historical fiction novel. i have found giving back to the community through volunteering to be fulfilling. started taking my health seriously. eating fresh foods, daily meditation, working out 4 times a week, two of those with a trainer.
then my life really changed the day i went to Target.
one visit to the bathroom, 2 hours later, i became a good woman myself.
my self esteem has improved now that i dominate in track and field, basketball, swimming, volleyball and tennis.
i don’t need a man, or a woman to feel good about myself.”
Response: You still need therapy. Stop scamming people, non-S.Collar! (non-scholar)
Hopefully a good chuckle was had by all (except the above individuals).
Let’s take a moment to explore what couples counseling can and cannot do for a couple:
CANNOT:
It can’t bind wounded hearts. Every failing marriage or other failing relationship has hurting hearts. Those find healing only if BOTH partners are willing to work toward the same goal. My wife, a couples counselor, knows by the behaviors, attitudes, and words of the couples which individuals have one foot out the door already. If they have already decided to leave, why they agreed to go to counseling is a mystery. Were they hoping for some miracle? Either that or they are trying to get an advantage or time, money, or some way to twist a knife one more time. Sadly, a few come to therapy to end it on a better note (like that is a gift??).
The therapist can’t solve their hurts. The couple and therapist can use the time to seek hope, rebuild trust, rebuild purpose and generate new respect. If one refuses to “come to the table” then there is almost no hope of restoration. What the therapist does is guide the willing couple through exercises to rebuild what they feel has been lost, find forgiveness, and offer ways to communicate better. Truth is, some couples NEVER communicated well in the first place. Some know each other’s opinions or preferences less than they know a co-worker’s.
CAN:
Counseling can cure a failing relationship, even after cheating, if BOTH desire to re-build for the right reasons. You might know someone who restored the marriage because of the children, or because of money. However, when you know that the relationship started out good, good can be restored.
Counseling can overcome contempt if both partners are willing to cooperate. First, the one doing contemptible things can understand the harm of the attitudes, words, and behaviors. Then, the other can change how he or she sees the other. Strangely, standing in another’s shoes, seeing relationships where that person grew up, and other things can make that partner more affirming and less critical.
The above quoted comments show individuals who have no clue, and many of them don’t want a clue. Stay away from such people. Don’t be like them. Surround yourself instead with wise and thoughtful, people by being wise and thoughtful yourself. Maybe you heard the one essential: BOTH.
Copyright 2026 Donald Whelpley
[PLEASE NOTE that Don is always open to discussing the thoughts and opinions he shares here and welcomes comments as shared in the comment section. He doesn’t use other social media platforms and won’t see whatever you’d like to share with him if you post it elsewhere.
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