GUEST POST from Don: Skills Children Should Learn

SKILLS CHILDREN SHOULD LEARN

Three things:

First, I could have done better.  Don’t get me wrong, I had a good father.  However, like most fathers of that era, he was aloof.  I don’t remember him spending much time with us.  I thought I would be better … and I think I was.  However, now that I’m at the other end of it I have looked back and found a few things I might have done better.  I realized I should have taught our children more things which would serve them well now that they are adults.  In the process I realized these are things others who have kids at home might wish to work into the parenting routine.

Second, it is time for Resolutions for the New Year.  Most resolutions are directed toward self improvement and the only person to hold me to the intent … is ME.  However, if directed toward helping kids grow up better … maybe it will work out better.  It certainly can’t make things worse.

Third, I have noticed a few parents who seem clueless.  Why did they have children?  Why do they imagine that their kids should have even less instruction about how to be an adult than they received themselves?

I’ve chosen just a few skills I wish I had improved upon with my children:

1. WASH HANDS OFTEN.  Simply, washing hands leads to fewer sick days.  When my kids were in school I was doing pest control.  One thing I did faithfully was wash my hands.  Before touching my body (face, etc) and especially before eating I soaped my hands and rinsed.  I noticed something amazing … while my children had just as many colds and other upper respiratory illnesses as most children, I rarely became sick.  I washed my hands often and still do.  This one skill could make a huge difference for kids, too.

2. CHOOSE BETTER FOOD.  A recent oral surgery reminded me how easy it is to lose stubborn weight.  I was placed on a liquid diet on which I struggled to put 1,000 calories in my face per day.  I lost 3 pounds in 4 days (which did not return when I transitioned to squishy foods).  It is almost all about calories.  Sure!  Getting the RIGHT balance of foods is essential.  Years ago I made a rule for myself.  Always include a small amount of protein daily, but allow myself as many fresh fruits or vegetables as my heart desired. (Sugar is not a vegetable.  Pie is not a fruit.) Additionally I limited starches like potatoes, rice, breads and chips.  Result was pounds lost every single year (30 pounds over 10 years, thank you!) and I weigh less now than I did 5 years after college.  

3. BE ACTUALLY SOCIAL.  Stay away from fake social (media) and get outside with other kids and play.  Encourage your kids to take up a team sport.  Go to events.  Our kids even went to political rallies from both sides of the aisle (can you think of any other child who had a picture taken with a governor and a first lady?)  They went to horse riding camps.  We took them to amazing shows (like “Riverdance”) and museums (“Bodies Revealed” where entire the human body was shown and yes, they were fascinated).  

4. LEARN TO CONVERSE WITH ADULTS.  Politeness and being interested count.  Ask thoughtful questions.  Use complete sentences.  Be respectful.  Be present. 

 

5. EDUCATION IS (ALMOST) EVERYTHING.  It is the most “grown-up” thing kids can do.  Actually, it will impact an entire life.  The less a person knows the fewer choices they have.

6. BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR BELONGINGS.  Learn early how to care for your toys and you will have learned a life-lesson.  As a service provider I visited thousands of homes.  I was amazed how many had cabinet doors which were hanging loose because no one tightened a loose screw.  How simple is that?  Using a screwdriver is a simple skill which should be learned early.  Put them “in charge” of tightening things and repairing stuff.

7. BE KIND.  (Pets, family, friends, schoolmates)   Unlearn teasing.  Avoid cruelty.  Eliminate coarse jokes.  You don’t have to be pleasant to someone you don’t like, but why go out of the way to be mean?   Eliminate all name calling.  You’ve just helped your children take a step up.  Result:  You will feel better about them and they will feel better about themselves.

8. READ physical books.  (Libraries are great resources).  Kids who read are kids who know things that are not learned in school.  For example, they know the meanings of words they can’t pronounce (that’s not bad since non-readers also can’t pronounce them and don’t know their meanings either).

9. PLANING AHEAD (USING A “RED TEAM” MINDSET).  Many financial and relational losses are related to poor planning and execution.  Corporations use “Red Team” planning which is simply looking for the potential pitfalls and building safety into decisions.  (How long will it take?  Add an hour and get it done early.)  Learn this:  “You can’t prevent every emergency, but some emergencies ARE preventable.”  It takes less than a minute to walk around your car to look for flat tires or hanging tailpipe.  It takes awareness to check your fuel gauge before heading out of town.  It only takes a minute to check a map to make sure you know where you’re going.  (You might prevent hypothermia by carrying a blanket in your car for winter travel.)  Those who plan ahead are less likely to have “emergencies.”

Anyway, maybe it would help a good parent to have a few “extra skills” in mind when raising kids.  Your kids will thank you (later).  You may even thank yourself later when your kids act more mature as adults than their peers.  After all, there are many adult children who end up coming back home to live after a bad start on adulthood.  If they have to come back, I think you would want them to have some useful life skills.  Can they cook, do laundry, run a vacuum, and change a tire?  You raised them either to be interesting and useful, or not.  

These are serving suggestions.  Make up your own list if you want.

Copyright 2025 Donald Whelpley

[PLEASE NOTE that Don is always open to discussing the thoughts and opinions he shares here and welcomes comments as shared in the comment section. He doesn’t use other social media platforms and won’t see whatever you’d like to share with him if you post it elsewhere.
ALSO, Don is always open to offer his thoughts on various topics. If you have a specific request, you can let him know in a comment; he reads – and replies to – them all. ~ Sherry]

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